Need uppers

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If I had speed I would do it just to induce a false sense of momentum and beat the desire to hide under my covers until the world just finally decides to up and self destruct. Though it may not actually fill me with enough chemically induced happy feelings to want to go out and participate in the world, it may make me so jittery and ancy that I coul not stay home.
I need rose colored goggles, the kind that wrap around your head covering all your vision in pretty rosey pinks without the slightest peripheral glance at drab reality.
Right now I just bury myself in alcohol or video games till all my world blurs into one big happy fuzzy ball. And thats not very productive for my existence. Its a bit more productive than when I try not to bury myself in escapism and instead and up in a not so happy fuzzy ball of hatred and loathing for the world and the moronic minions who dominate it.
Sometimes I envy the bouncy bimbos my life immitates when I go out to clubs at night and mercilessly deride all others, for as they say, ignorance is bliss. I try to pretend, I try to make myself stupid with chemicals. But the bliss never comes, and if does visit, it is fleeting at best.
Do street corner dealers sell Zanax?
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Rachel Corrie

A topic of an email list I have been on has recently centered on Rachel Corrie. This is a girl who went to Palastine to face the horrible attrocities the Palastinians suffer at the will of Isreal. She was killed by a bulldozer when she stood infront of a Palastinian home and the Isreali soldier at the controls of the bulldozer, ran her over just the same.
The very coporate and politically corect Wall Street Journal has found the tenacity to award her the "Little Green Football" award for stupidity.

http://littlegreenfootballs.com/weblog/?entry=9598_The_EnvelopePlease

But a friend writes a better interpretation of ( her actions and her reasons. )

I just thought I would share.
There is a link to her letters. I suggest reading them.

Run for the Border

Wow. Palestinian children are being murderd by US funded Israeli soldiers in the streets infront of their homes.
A 14 year old girl carved herself up with the kitchen carving knife because her brothers won't leave her alone at night, and her mom blames her.
A woman is the latest to be shot in the back of the head as she left her house to her car for no discernable reason.
Thousands of "terrorist suspects" are being held without any rights to see or talk to anyone for an undetermind amount of time right here in the Land of the Free.

I am hungry. I think I shall go eat Taco Bell.